Archive for February 28th, 2009

بسم الله الرحمان الرحيم

السلام عليكم و رحمة الله و بركاته

الحمد الله

Many a times we see brothers and sisters in situations when they are trying to convince their parents or their friends about some Islamic issue when they find their close ones doing something haraam. And then they might even complain that their parents are not listening to them even though they have provided sufficient adillah. Do you notice a missing ingredient here? It is nothing other than good akhlaaq when trying to persuade someone or even trying to convey some sort of message that might receive a bad response.

Allah سبحانه و تعالى says,

فَبِمَا رَحْمَةٍ مِّنَ اللَّهِ لِنتَ لَهُمْ ۖ وَلَوْ كُنتَ فَظًّا غَلِيظَ الْقَلْبِ لَانفَضُّوا مِنْ حَوْلِكَ فَاعْفُ عَنْهُمْ وَاسْتَغْفِرْ لَهُمْ

“And by the Mercy of Allâh, You dealt with them gently. And had You been Severe and harsh hearted, they would have broken away from about you; so pass over (their faults), and ask (Allâh’s) Forgiveness for them …” [1]

In this ayah Allah سبحانه و تعالى tells us how Merciful He has been with our Prophet صلى الله عليه و سلم by making him deal gently with the Sahabah رضي الله عنهم. And this is the type of manner we should employ when we give Da‘wah to others or when we try to invite others to an Islamic event.

Imam Al-Hasan Al-Basri رحمه الله said that “This, indeed, is the description of the behaviour that Allah سبحانه و تعالى sent Muhammad صلى الله عليه و سلم with.” [2]

Indeed it was from the Infinite Mercy of Allah سبحانه و تعالى that He made Prophet صلى الله عليه و سلم gentle and kind with his companions رضي الله عنه and set us the best example of dealing with others.

فَبِمَا رَحْمَةٍ مِّنَ اللَّهِ لِنتَ لَهُمْ

Imam Al Baghawi رحمه الله writes in his Tafsir, “Easy and soft manners, great toleration towards them (Sahabah رضي الله عنهم) and did not rush with them even one day in what they were indulged.”[3] Ease in dealing and having good manners is something that carries a lot of weight when one is trying to teach others. Usually one rushes in an action when he is getting frustrated with it and can’t bear it any more whereas the manner of Prophet صلى الله عليه و سلم was the exact contrary of it.

Al Qushayri رحمه الله said, “Know that Allah سبحانه و تعالى loves those servants who have a compassionate character and a servant does not have mercy except when Allah سبحانه و تعالى has mercy upon him.”[4]

وَلَوْ كُنتَ فَظًّا غَلِيظَ الْقَلْبِ

Qatadah رحمه الله said, “In order that Allah سبحانه و تعالى would purify (Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه و سلم’s heart) from dryness and hardness and make it close, merciful and compassionate to the believers.”

Ibn Ishaaq رحمه الله said, “It is the mention of the gentleness with them (Sahabah رضي الله عنهم) and his patience with their weaknesses.” [5]

Goodness and softness attract people and thus it is amongst the most important characteristics of a Da‘ee (caller to Allah سبحانه و تعالى). It is from the built in nature of a man to go where he is treated good and therefore if one treats other in a good manner, he will receive the same in return insha’Allah.

فَظْ as described by Imam Al Baydaawi رحمه الله means dry character. [6]

Imam Al Shawkaani رحمه الله described the same word with unpleasant character. [7]

Imam Al Baghawi رحمه الله explained the word as, “Bad character and lack of patience.”[8]

This type of nature is of a person whose surroundings do not concerns him much and have no or almost no affect on him. It also means to not have much care of the people’s issues and treat them insignificant.

غَلِيظَ الْقَلْبِ

Al Kalbi رحمه الله said, “فَظْ is in speech and غَلِيظَ الْقَلْب in action.” [9]

Imam Al Th‘alabi رحمه الله said, “Words on an angry face, lack of clemency and consideration.”[10]

لَانفَضُّوا مِنْ حَوْلِكَ

This means that they might have left or departed from you (Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه و سلم)[11]

Because if people are treated with bad manners then they will for sure try to leave and be away from that person of evil character and this is human nature. Thus, if a child tries to persuade his mother to buy him to but starts misbehaving, then she will start ignoring the child and not get him what he desires.

Thus, we learn from this ayah:

1) The Mercy Allah سبحانه و تعالى had on His Prophet صلى الله عليه و سلم

2) Sunnah of Prophet صلى الله عليه و سلم in dealing with other people.

3) The lofty character of Prophet صلى الله عليه و سلم

4) The Da‘wah technique of Prophet صلى الله عليه و سلم

5) Importance of good manners in engagement with others

6) Evils of bad personality

7) Meanings of فَظْ and غَلِيظَ الْقَلْب and the differences between them

8) Effect of evil and vile behaviour

And indeed, Allah سبحانه و تعالى knows best.

[1] Surat `Al ‘Imran, ayah 159

[2] Tafsir Ibn Kathir

[3] Tafsir Al Baghawi

[4] Al Tahbeer

[5] Tafsir Al Tabari

[6] Tafsir Al Baydaawi

[7] Fath Al Qadeer

[8] Tafsir Al Baghawi

[9] Tafsir Al Baghawi

[10] Tafsir Al Th‘alabi

[11] Tafsir Al Tabari

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